SIL, as long as I've known her, has never had a weight problem. Her weight, in the 15+ years I've known her, has seemed quite stable. Her weight appeared to be just where it needed to be not too heavy or too thin. And didn't seem to change from one time seeing her to the next.
Whenever we have been together she seemed to have eaten whatever she wanted. Things like potato chips, cookies, sweet beverages. All those things that I avoid, she ate. She is a slow eater and has no issues leaving food on her plate once she's had her fill. At the same time, I've been in situations where she has eaten beyond full if her comments later were to be believed. Still her weight seemed to remain constant.
This time when I saw her she looked a bit heavy. I dismissed it immediately, thinking it had to be the cut of her clothes or a trick of the light, something. After all, her weight never seemed to change, ever.
During the visit, though, she confessed to me that she'd gained 8 pounds over the winter. She retired at the end of last year. She took early retirement because her husband was quite ill and she wanted to be more available to him. They had a hard winter with surgeries, rehab, and all sorts of doctor visits. That, added with the bitterly cold weather, kept them inside most of the time. She said that the only thing they had to do was eat.
I should add at this point that SIL does not cook. Her husband always did, but wasn't able to during the winter months. They relied heavily on take out, friends, and various other quick, easy to prepare (heat & eat) or snack type foods.
She was distressed that the pounds had crept on and her clothes were no longer comfortable. She sought advise from me as to how to get the weight off this summer. I must admit that initially, anger flared inside me. I thought she should just get over those 8 little pounds and come talk to me when she had 80 pounds to lose. Almost immediately, I realized the fallacy of that thinking.
That thinking is why I got in the shape I am now. If I had dealt with 8 pounds when they crept up, I wouldn't be on this journey now. So, I commended her on being concerned. Shared some of the things that had worked for me, like keeping those simple carbs low and we had a nice chat about the issues surrounding the gain and better strategies for both of us to keep our weight in check. It was a good thing.
I think, she helped me far more than I helped her!