I am learning a lot about myself along this road, some are pleasant and some not so much. I try to appreciate the lessons no matter how hard because they are making me a better person, not just a thinner person.
Several weeks ago I learned the term precheat. I knew I did it but I'd never labeled it. Once I did, however, it was much easier to identify and even stop. Note I did not say it was easy to stop, but easier to stop as in not quite as hard. So, now I know that giving something a name makes it more real and easier to recognize and halt.
I've come up with another name for a behavior that I've done for probably my entire adult life, and that is pre-eat. Pre-eating is what I call eating while I'm preparing my meal. This condition most manifests itself, when I've allowed myself to become too hungry before eating. I'm not talking about tasting items to be sure the seasoning is correct. I'm talking about eating practically an entire meal while cooking another one.
I know I did this years ago when I was preparing family meals. I'd even plan for it. I'd add a couple of extra rolls to the pan so I could eat those before the meal was served. Stuff like that. There were times when I would sit down at the table to eat the meal and I was no longer hungry. Of course, I didn't let that stop me. No way! I'd worked hard on this meal and besides it tasted great. I am a good cook.
Now it isn't quite so bad, but it happens. I even pre-eat on plan!! Say for instance, I am meticulously weighing my chicken so as not to get too much and I'll pop a few almonds in my mouth. Dry roasted almonds with sea salt are a good healthy snack choice. They have protein and good fat. It is virtuous as snacks go,so no harm done. I don't think so! Not when it isn't counted.
I realized this early in the week this week. The evening meal is really the only time this happens, mostly because my other meals are heat & eat. Of course, at work there is nothing around to pop in my mouth. That helps. So, now when I start preparing my evening meal, I make sure there are no almonds (or any other virtuous) snack food anywhere in sight. When I feel like I need something because I am truly hungry, I remind myself that pre-eating is not a good thing and that my chicken will be done soon enough. I'm not going to pass out or anything!! I'm also working to arrange my schedule so that I can have a late afternoon snack and not get quite so hungry. In my work environment, I can't always do that.
It is hard for me to face facts that indicate I am less than perfect. Somehow though, when the light bulb when off in my head about this one, I was relieved. It was as if a burden had just been lifted from my shoulders. I'm wondering if this condition was so deeply ingrained in my habits that I did it all of the time. Perhaps it accounts for some of those times when I was absolutely certain that I'd not gone over calorie/carb/whatever goals for the day but I had. I just didn't recognize it and didn't count the calories.
For me this is very different that breaking down and having those girl scout cookies that won't stop torturing me from the freezer. This is almost entirely on a subconscious level, almost like an involuntary reaction. Now I know. Now I can do something about it. I know it won't be easy, but it won't be as hard as it once was, and not nearly as frustrating! I am truly happy to have discovered this chink in my armour! I think even that says a lot about my growth.
Thanks for reading!
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5 days ago