Total Weight Loss

Monday, May 28, 2012

Monday Mileage

I got my ticker updated this morning, but had a family party today so I'm just now back to writing.

I am tearing up the mileage.  I'm quite pleased with my progress on that front.  Every day while I was gone except for one I got over 10,000 steps and most days it was more like 12,000 steps.  The one day I dipped below was the at sea day when it rained.   It is hard to get in many steps aboard a ship in the pouring rain.  I didn't let that defeat me though.  I just did the best I could and felt good about it.

On the other hand, since I've been back, I have not been able to focus on a healthy eating plan at all! I really don't understand what is happening in my head.  Maybe if I just keep typing it will become apparent.  Read on or not.  This part is for me, and may not make sense to anyone else, or even me.

 I'm not having epic battles about should I or shouldn't I eat this or that.  I just do.  I went to the store Saturday and got lots of good fresh produce.  I even got a watermelon at the farmers' market.  This is the best time of year for delicious, fresh produce.  So far, I've eaten a banana and the watermelon is uncut in the refrigerator along with the lettuce and asparagus cut fresh from my back yard.  Why?  Not to mention the homemade yogurt which I love and the chicken breast marinating since Saturday.  (It may not be palatable anymore!)

I've got to figure out what to do to move ahead.  It is like my brain has just stalled.  I don't want to put myself back in that strict box that hcg requires.  I want to be able to enjoy the bounty of the summer produce.  I've strongly considered Weight Watchers.  65MD has even said he'll do it with me.  (I have another blog post about him being called fat on our trip.  I'll share that later this week.)  I just can't seem to get motivated to even go over to the WW website and check it out. 

I know the formula for weight loss.  I don't know if I really need the structure of a plan or not.  I just know I need a swift kick in the pants to get going again.  I can't continue to gain a little here and a little there.  That makes a lot. 

What to do?  What to do?  How is it I can burn up the mileage and be so motivated in that area and so blah in the food area?  Why can't I get it together?  I don't know.  I never have thought I was an individual to self sabotage, but maybe I am.  Maybe I'm just in some sort of denial.  Maybe on some level I don't want to get to my goal.  I really don't think so.  Blah!!  I just don't know!!!


  1. Hey there friend...this is truly the kind of post that is really hard to comment on. We've all been there and recognize that anything at all is going to sound pretty trite and certainly nothing you don't already know. You've lost a tremendous amount of weight - you know exactly how to go about losing the rest of it. WW might help, another "plan" might help, but I'm not sure anything can help any more than the constant support of your friends in BlogWorld and consistent following of the food rules you know so well. It's so hard and there will ALWAYS be another event, another family get together, another birthday or anniversary, another fill-in-the-blank. I think, for you, it's just going to have to come down to a determined choice that you ARE going to do this and you ARE going to abide by your eating plan no matter what. You can do it! I KNOW YOU CAN!

  2. Lori...I am so with you. How our mind and motivation is all over the place. I wonder if it is a woman thing or do men get that way too!! I seem to be also lacking motivation...I even think about not going anywhere near my blog! You've lost so much've done such a great job. You're exercise is great. You're doing better than I am. I can't seem to get enthusiastic about food or exercise at the moment...sigh..

  3. the fear of success how i wrestle with that bloody demon! best i can tell you just do it. there is no simple cure but you're intelligent so make the healthy meals and keep the junk out of the house. eventually you're enthusiasm will ick in!

  4. I wish I knew what it is that makes me sometimes motivated and sometimes not. Seems many of us suffer this same thing. All I can say at this point is that maybe you can ask yourself which you want more - the food in the moment, or everything that comes with eating on track. It might be time to remind yourself of all the benefits for you personally of eating well.