Sparkpeople

After blogging yesterday, I reactivated my sparkpeople account.  It is a free on-line food tracker.  I'm hoping that will do the trick for me.  I just felt like Weight Watchers would be a waste of money in my frame of mind.  Sparkpeople will give meal plans or simply track what is eaten.  For now, I'll track and see where I need to tweak.  If I don't see results either physically or mentally soon, I'll try the meal plan approach. Let's hope for the best.

Now for the promised trip story about 65MD.  65MD is not fat.  He's one of those frustrating individuals that can eat just about anything he wants in any amount he wants without gaining weight.  He weighs a little more than he should, but I don't think he's in the overweight category.  Keep that in mind, when reading this.

We flew in to Orlando for our cruise.  The ship was docked at Port Canaveral, so a shuttle service met us at the airport for the drive to the port.  We were met by a fireball of a lady.  She was tall and very, very thin.  She zipped around like she was electrified.  High energy doesn't not begin to describe this lady.  She jumped out of the van and snatched our luggage away from us like it was nothing.  She was also chatting away the whole time.

She began to tell us about visiting the beach the day before.  Apparently, there were quite a few very large women on the beach in very small bikinis.  She was expressing concern that the women dress with more modesty.  In trying to give us an idea about the size of the women she said they were larger than 65MD.

We sat there in stunned silence.  One, because I used to be one of those very large women on the beach, although not in a bikini. My heart aches for them, but at the same time, I applaud them for being confident enough in themselves to wear what makes them feel good. 

And, two, bigger than my husband???  Really???  And to say that in front of him?


Worst of all, I don't think she noticed that we didn't respond.  She just zipped right on to the next topic on her mind.


I'd like to hear my readers thoughts on this.  What would have been an appropriate response?  I'm still scratching my head in wonder over it.

Monday Mileage

I got my ticker updated this morning, but had a family party today so I'm just now back to writing.

I am tearing up the mileage.  I'm quite pleased with my progress on that front.  Every day while I was gone except for one I got over 10,000 steps and most days it was more like 12,000 steps.  The one day I dipped below was the at sea day when it rained.   It is hard to get in many steps aboard a ship in the pouring rain.  I didn't let that defeat me though.  I just did the best I could and felt good about it.

On the other hand, since I've been back, I have not been able to focus on a healthy eating plan at all! I really don't understand what is happening in my head.  Maybe if I just keep typing it will become apparent.  Read on or not.  This part is for me, and may not make sense to anyone else, or even me.

 I'm not having epic battles about should I or shouldn't I eat this or that.  I just do.  I went to the store Saturday and got lots of good fresh produce.  I even got a watermelon at the farmers' market.  This is the best time of year for delicious, fresh produce.  So far, I've eaten a banana and the watermelon is uncut in the refrigerator along with the lettuce and asparagus cut fresh from my back yard.  Why?  Not to mention the homemade yogurt which I love and the chicken breast marinating since Saturday.  (It may not be palatable anymore!)


I've got to figure out what to do to move ahead.  It is like my brain has just stalled.  I don't want to put myself back in that strict box that hcg requires.  I want to be able to enjoy the bounty of the summer produce.  I've strongly considered Weight Watchers.  65MD has even said he'll do it with me.  (I have another blog post about him being called fat on our trip.  I'll share that later this week.)  I just can't seem to get motivated to even go over to the WW website and check it out. 

I know the formula for weight loss.  I don't know if I really need the structure of a plan or not.  I just know I need a swift kick in the pants to get going again.  I can't continue to gain a little here and a little there.  That makes a lot. 

What to do?  What to do?  How is it I can burn up the mileage and be so motivated in that area and so blah in the food area?  Why can't I get it together?  I don't know.  I never have thought I was an individual to self sabotage, but maybe I am.  Maybe I'm just in some sort of denial.  Maybe on some level I don't want to get to my goal.  I really don't think so.  Blah!!  I just don't know!!!

Coca-Cola

We are back from a few days on the high seas.  It was not what we expected in that it rained virtually the whole time we were on the ship.  We managed to have a good time and relax so that is all that matters.

It has been a while since we sailed and we were on a new cruise line, so I don't know if the food selection was due to changes overall in the industry or this particular cruise line, regardless, I was pleased.  The dining room had a separate menu for healthy options.  There was whole fruit available 24/7.  And a great salad bar open most of the time as well.

I made good choices most of the time.  I had a few indulgences like ordering two desserts one night because I wanted key lime pie and warm chocolate cake, and I did not feel like sharing.  I also made it a practice not to eat everything on my plate.  As silly as that sounds, this is hard one for me.  Leaving food behind is against my frugal nature.  Knowing that any amount of food is around anytime made it a little easier for me to leave a bite or two behind each meal.  Some meals I left more.  I am hoping this practice will help going forward, allowing me the freedom to stop eating when I'm full even if food is left.  Only time will tell on that.

I felt like I did well since most of the time, I was feeling hungry when it was time to eat again.  I did not walk around feeling stuffed and uncomfortable.  That was great progress.

There was only one time that I really had no good options.  65MD and I had wandered away from the tourist area near the ship in Nassau.  We like to do that.  We like to get a bit more of the local flavor of the places we visit.  It was in between rain showers, so it was quite steamy out.  The kind of heat where the humidity can be felt.  We were quite thirsty and were looking for a little market to get a canned or bottled drink.  We did not want a fountain drink or ice.  I came home from one trip with E-coli so we were not taking any chances.

We came upon a small place where the proprietor greeted us warmly in Spanish.  He shook 65MD's hand like they were long lost friends.  For a moment, I really thought he was a friend from long ago.  We asked if we could get a drink there and rest for a bit and he said "No."  So, we asked if he knew of a place where we could get a drink and sit for a while.  Again he answered "No."  He was still smiling and acted as though he was eager to please, when I realized he was trying to tell us he did not understand English.  65MD and I know a few Spanish phrases, and when the man greeted 65MD so enthusiastically asking how he was, the fact that he was so friendly registered but not the fact that the two of them were both speaking Spanish.  I asked in Spanish if he spoke English.  His face lit up with the realization that we understood his language.  We quickly explained that our knowledge of Spanish was very limited.  65MD thought he was saying 'drink' in Spanish and gesturing as though he was taking a drink.  The man looked a little puzzled and then 65MD said "Coca-Cola."  Again the man's face lit up with understanding.  He rushed in to his little market and came out with two red cans that were ice cold.

I was so happy that we had communicated that well and so glad to see that nice cold can, I gladly took it.  I wasn't about to try and figure out the Spanish word for diet but I did know the word "gracias!" We paid for the drinks and I enjoyed every drop.  I know I wasn't dehydrated in the desert or anything that dire, but I felt no guilt at all for drinking it. It didn't send me on a downward spiral looking for cookies or anything else like that.  It was a nice flavorful way to quench my thirst, without getting anything that might require hospitalization later on!!!

My weight was up when I got home.  It wasn't unexpected.  The two desserts and the real Coke certainly added to the extra calories.  I think though that my biggest problem was not enough water.  I've gotten right back to that and expect the weight to come back down.

I learned that ship walking is almost as good as beach walking when it isn't raining.  I'll report on that on Monday.

Ahoy, Matey

In the morning 65MD and I are headed to the deep blue sea.  He has a conference where he is presenting research and it happens to be aboard a cruise ship.  I happen to be tagging along. 

So, Monday Mileage just a little early.  Right now I have 369 miles.  It was a good week for walking.  I expect that to continue aboard the ship.  There are plenty of places to stroll and I plan to take full advantage of that.  In port, we love to explore and I expect to get a lot of steps in those days as well.

I'm not too worried about the food either.  On board a ship is the place where I can easily leave food on my plate because there is food all over the place.  There is no thought of having to eat now so I won't get hungry later or any nonsense like that.  I also think that the portions are more appropriate.  I don't recall ever leaving the dining room feeling so stuffed I needed to be rolled.  Even though it seems like a lot of rich, scrumptious food, I don't think it is too much.  We've never been ones to do the midnight buffet or 24 hour pizza.  That definitely helps.

In fact, the first cruise we took I think I actually lost weight.  It was nearly 12 years ago now.  I was probably a little bit lighter than I am now.  65MD was thrilled to be aboard a ship.  He is a major, major WWII naval history buff.  We had to explore every single nook & cranny of that ship two or three times.  We walked and walked and walked.  We walked up & down the ladders (the official navy name for steps aboard ship) so many times my glutes were screaming at me and my shorts were loose at the end of the trip.  Since I wasn't quite as meticulous about keeping records at that time, I can't say for sure.  But I think the loose shorts and sore hiney are two good indicators.

I've been reminding myself of that instance quite a bit these past few days.  I must confess that the sluggish thyroid thing has been working on me mentally and my weight has slowly been creeping up.  With that positive experience on which to draw, I'm hoping to use this trip to get back in a good place mentally with eating.  How ironic is it that I want to use a cruise as a catalyst for good eating???

I've also been reminding myself of all the good stuff we have planted in our backyard garden and all the other fresh goodies that are beginning to show up in the store and farmers' markets.  Summer time is a great time to enjoy fresh produce.  I want to make the best of it.

Be back in a week, slimmer and fitter, I hope; tanner and rested for sure!

Lunchtime Walks

Yesterday I decided to walk to a nearby sandwich & salad shop for lunch.  My intention was to walk there, get a salad and walk back.  The shop is 0.8 miles from our office building per Google maps.  I thought that would be a nice little diversion from walking laps in the parking lot at lunch time.  The only obstacle is that there a major, major intersection between the office and the restaurant.  Every person to whom I mentioned my idea was concerned about me crossing the street.  (Even 65MD after the fact last night, when I told him!)  This intersection always makes the list of "Most Dangerous" when the city officials decide to publish that info.

One of my coworkers wanted a salad but didn't want to walk.  I offered to get it for her, but between that and the evil intersection, we worked out a compromise.  I walked to the restaurant and she drove.  We placed our orders to go and she drove us both back to the office.  There were no near misses or drama of any type.  It was actually a pleasant little walk.

On Wednesdays another eating establishment nearby has their weekly special.  I announced early this morning my intention to walk over there and get lunch.  This place is only 0.3 miles per Google maps and two of my coworkers were up for the walk as well.  We walked over there, ate, and walked back.   We meandered around the long way through the parking lot so that we got in a few extra steps.  It was a little warmer today but still nice.

As we entered the building, upon returning from lunch, one of them said she was going to bring her walking shoes tomorrow.  It looks like, once again, I've started something.

Peer Pressure

When I first started this weigh loss journey, I had a hard time being around people when they were eating food I'd chosen not to.  It was worse, when I really wanted the food and they offered.  It was a struggle sometimes to smile and say "No, thank you" when all I really wanted to do was jerk the food out of their hands and cram it in.  But I survived. 

Now, I don't think much of it.  Sure, I want to eat cake when my friends are having some.  Some times I do.  Most of the time I don't.  Most of the time, I'm not even offered the taboo food.  I'm not sure when this happened exactly, but I noticed it today.

Today was our monthly birthday cake day.  The cake was in the kitchen at lunch today.  As each person finished their meal they would get a slice of cake.  No one took much notice of it, other than to comment on how good the cake was or something along those lines.  That is, until the cake got pushed in front of me.

We were making room for another person to join us at the table.  I'd finished my meal, but was enjoying the company for a few more minutes before returning to work.  Since the area in front of me was largely empty the cake got pushed in my direction.  Honestly, I thought nothing of it other than making room for this co-worker.  Thoughts about how good it smelled or how much I wanted a piece never entered my mind.  I'd had my meal and the cake was not a part of it.  Somehow in my brain at that time, the cake could have been anything, napkins, a dirty bowl, or a glass of tea, but it wasn't mine, so it didn't matter.  I wasn't going to eat anyone else's food.  I had mine.

Then someone exclaimed that the cake should not be in front of me.  She thought it was cruel to put the cake in front of me when I could not have any.  I insisted that it didn't matter, but someone 'rescued' me from the cake by moving it away.  It still didn't matter.

I began to think about how at the start of this, I felt pressure to eat and be like everyone else.  I felt as though I stood out because I was behaving in a different way from everyone else.  That added to the desire to eat and appear normal.  Now, I'm on the opposite end of that spectrum.  I have created a new expectation among my peers.  They know I don't usually eat cake and want to help me. They want to make sure temptation stays as far away as possible.  I really, really appreciate that.

It makes me wonder though. what if I'd wanted a piece of cake today?

Monday Mileage

I'm still motoring right along with my steps.  I haven't quite reached my goal of 21 miles per week, but I'm getting closer every week.  Progress is what matters.  I even got in two work outs with the weights.  It will take a while for it to get to be such a part of my routine that I'll easily do it three times per week.  The problem is my faulty memory not a battle to do it or not.  My head is in a good place with the exercise.

 

Now if I could just get the scales to budge, I'd be in business!

Lunchtime Steps

It is lunchtime and I have more steps now than I got all day yesterday.

Meetings

Meetings are the bane of my existence right now.  How is it that sitting is so tiring and draining?

 

This was my day today.  I left the house at my typical time, but instead of going to work I went to my mother's house. I took her to the next county, about an hour away, to probate my aunt's will.  That took about an hour, and then another hour home.  I got to work and was immediately whisked into an interview.  I was in the interview until 3:00.

 

So, effectively, I sat on my behind from nearly 8:00 am until after 3:00 except for brief trips between the car & door or restroom.  It isn't very helpful in walking 2.7 miles per day, now is it????

I managed to get in a nice walk after work.  I carried weights and did a mini upper arm workout as well. 

Tomorrow is another day, and I don't have any meetings scheduled.

Monday Mileage

I currently have 329 miles.  We've had a lot of storms lately, which have prevented me from walking outside.  If it were just a spring shower, I'd don my nylon jacket and walk.  I would after work, not during the work day.  I still need to be a little presentable in the office.  It hasn't mattered, however because we are getting storms; the kind with lightening and thunder. 

 We're in for severe weather this afternoon.  I'm hoping it will be over by the time I get home from work.  If not, I'll stay in.  I get a good number of steps in around the office every day. I'm not thrilled that I'm getting behind with my steps, but I'm not stressed over it either.  I'm taking it as a sign that I need to pace myself a little more.  I'll get the steps when the time is right.

Yogurt

I made yogurt yesterday.  Lyn did here, and I copied her.   It was super easy and the results were a great big YUM.

Just heat milk on low in the slow cooker for 2 1/2 hours.  Unplug it and let it sit for 3 more hours.  Do not open during this time.  The take out two cups and stir in 1/2 cup of plain yogurt, with live active cultures.   This can be store bough or homemade.  Return to slow cooker, replace lid and wrap in towels.  Wait another 8 hours, still unplugged.

I got some organic, whole milk at the grocery store for just under $4.  The container of yogurt was on sale for $1.  I scooped out 1/2 cup for the next batch, so I won't have that whopping expense next time!!!  It is a lot of yogurt for about $5.  It is also quite good.  It is a little thin, but not enough to bother me.

I added some strawberries from my uncle's garden to what I had for breakfast.  It was delicious.  Anyone that likes yogurt should try this.  There is nothing to it, other than waiting for time to pass.  Try it!

If anyone tries it post the results.  I want to know, but I fully expect another positive review.

The Doctor

On Monday I went to the doctor for a routine visit.  He likes to keep a close eye on me to keep me encouraged with the weight loss.  I was a little frustrated with a bit of a bounce in my weight.  I have been down in the 160's but can't seem to break that barrier.  What is more frustrating is that I ease up in to the 170's way too often.  I have lost the same 10-12 pounds more times that I care to count.  As he and I discussed my eating and exercise habits he was pleased.  He found nothing wrong with my patterns in either area,  but then he asked about strength training.

I realized he'd hit exactly on the issue.  I am doing great with aerobic activity, and I make good choices the majority of the time with eating, but I am doing no resistance training of any type.  I was so pleased that he'd asked.  I decided right then and there to start immediately.  I have a couple of hand weights.  I could walk holding those or do some various arm exercises right away.  BUT, I haven't done it.  The week got away from me.  I have some very good reasons for letting it slip my mind.  I'm not going to get in to those.  What I am going to do is use those weights three times a week beginning today.  Beginning as soon as a hit publish. I mean it.

I got a letter from the doctor on yesterday, which brought all of this to mind.  That was a good thing.  There is no telling how long it would have taken me to remember to find the weights if I hadn't.  There was also a bit of disconcerting news.  Apparently, my thyroid function is low.  Part of me is relieved that it has finally shown up.  The doctor and I have agreed for some time that I have every single symptom of hypothyroidism.  The blood test never showed it.

The plan for now, however is to test it again at my next visit in August.  In the meantime, I'm going to keep eating healthy, walking, and developing a routine with the weights.  Feel free to hold me accountable on it!