This morning the scales read 169.6. It was up 1.2 lbs from yesterday so last night cost me at least 1.2 lbs. It was a mediocre meal* at best. While I'm irritated that I've got to yet again lose those 1.2 lbs, it is different somehow. I feel almost like I got ripped off from a purchase or something like that. Since the meal wasn't the best, and I really didn't have a choice other than how much, I wanted to eat when I got home. My thoughts were something along the lines of "You're going to gain, so why not get something good." I knew, however, that would only create a larger gain and I'd be doubly frustrated. It also helped that it was late and I just went to bed. This morning I have been right back on plan and really haven't been too tempted to cheat.
*The mediocre meal - those readers triggered by the mention of food should skip this part. We were served a small salad, a small piece of steak, half a chicken breast, green beans, half baked potato and bread. Dessert was either a brownie or creme brulee. The salad was nice and probably the high point of the meal. It was quite small though, maybe a cup. The steak was probably about 3 ounces, and hardly seasoned. We never could figure out the chicken. It had something inside of it that we thought might be supposed to make it cordon bleu, but there was such a small amount we couldn't tell. The green beans were canned and the baked potato seemed like something reheated from the frozen food section of the grocery store! I ate the steak, a few bites of chicken (it was really dry too), almost all of the green beans, and enough of the potato to be polite.
Then came dessert. I was served a brownie and 65MD was served creme brulee. We agreed to share. The brownie was so hard I could hardly get my fork in it and the creme brulee was cold & watery. I had two bites of each and let 65MD have the rest. For the record the couple next to us did the same thing. She's a tiny, little lady that loves dessert. She often eats hers and her husbands. She had only a bite or two and pushed both dishes towards her husband. I was a little relieved that the dessert was as bad as the meal because I wasn't tempted to over indulge there.
The food discussion is over and it is safe to start reading again!!
It seems clear to me that something has changed inside. In year's past, I would've eaten the entire meal even if it was bad. I probably had at least half of both desserts and probably snacked when I got home to make up for the bad food!!! I know I have a long way to go to have a normal relationship with food, but I see the progress! Hooray!
To all of my readers that are mothers - HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY tomorrow!!
January 1, 2019: 187 Pounds... and a Plan
5 years ago
I dunno. What you had to eat doesn't sound like it should have made a dent in the scale. Look somewhere else unless the salad was really salty.
ReplyDeleteWe both know that you didn't gain over a pound of fat overnight, anyway. If it's just sodium, it'll let lose unless something else is going on.
Personally, I think that if the scale played fair, you would have shown a FIVE pound LOSS after that teensy and lackluster meal. !
I think that the difference in your at home behavior was stellar! I know that I have done exactly as you described your past reaction--probably still would. :(
Great job!
Deb
In my past, I would have eaten anything no matter the taste. Now, if it does not taste good, I don't eat. I don't care what it is. Just not worth it to me!
ReplyDeleteJust keep focused my friend, you are doing great!