17 Day Diet Report

I started the 17DD on Monday as planned.  I was mentally ready.  For me, getting my mind in the game is the biggest factor for success.  So on Monday I had my food planned and ate just as I should.  During the afternoon, I began to feel something akin to hunger.  It wasn't a stomach growling, I must eat sort of feeling, just an emptiness in my stomach. 

I must say, I sort of liked that feeling.  It was not a bad feeling.  It made me realize that I'd taken back control when it came to food.  I had, too often over the last few days, felt overfull and bloated.  I much prefer the lighter feeling.  I began to think about how that would make a good blog post but I never could quite articulate it well enough to make a full post of it.  I liked it and I was glad.

Yesterday, I planned my food much as I had on Monday.  Whn I find something that works for me and I stick with it.  This is one of those areas I plan to address, but not right now,  :)  During the afternoon, I got hungry but not like Monday.  I.got.hungry!  My stomach was growling loudly.  It was embarrassing.  I had nothing for a snack at work, so I had to just tough it out.  I drank and drank water trying to keep my stomach from being completely empty.

Both of these experiences led me to believe that I really don't know the right amount of food satisfies me.  With the hcg, my food was very strictly controlled and the hunger was managed by the hormone.  With low carb, I kept nuts around for a little snack here and there.  With this plan, I've got to be a little more deliberate.  There is nothing I can stash in my desk drawer for those little 'emergencies.'

Today, I have made a few tweaks like adding protein and spreading things out a bit.  I'll see how that works and make adjustments as needed.  So far, the scales have responded favorably, but I'm not saying until after the full 17 days have elapsed. 

Now if I could just get my sinuses and the weather to cooperate, I'll be in fine shape.

Moday Mileage

As of the end of the day yesterday, I had 126 miles.  Damp and chilly weather returned over the weekend and I developed a sinus infection, so I was unable to sustain the number of steps I got last Thursday.  I didn't expect too.  When spring is here to stay look out!  I'm ready.  I have a pair of walking shoes at work ready for any suitable day that comes along. 

In spite of my less than 100% health at the moment, I started the 17 Day Diet today.  I don't want to waste any more time.  I was mentally prepared to start today.  Delaying would have served no purpose.  I am trying to keep my expectations in check, because I don't want to set myself up for disappointment.  At the same time, I haven't been this excited about a food plan in a long time.

It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

Yesterday was a fabulous spring-like day.  The skies were sunny and the temps were in the 70's.  There was a nice breeze.  It was so gorgeous it was easy to forget that it is still February.

I took full advantage of the day.  After eating my healthy lunch from home, I donned my walking shoes and did a few laps around the parking lot.  It was great for the body and the mind.  My attitude and I think productivity were much better after the walk.  I had just ticked over 12,000 steps when I left the office!  By bedtime I had well over 14,000 steps. 

I know that it is still winter so I can't expect to walk outside at lunch but it was so nice to get this little glimpse of spring and know what is ahead.  I know I'll get a lot more steps in then.  By the time spring is here to stay, I should be well in to the 17 Day Diet as well.  Look out world!

Perspective

Perspective is a funny thing.  I think we all get ideas in our heads that may or may not be accurate but that doesn't matter.  It is our reality.  It happened to me yesterday.

After I published by blog, I got very down on myself.  I kept thinking about how I was blowing nearly three years of hard work with poor choices lately.  Then I got down on myself for taking nearly two years to lose 30 lbs.  It was a downward spiral.  One thought led to another and by the time I started to prepare my evening meal, I was really in a state of despair.

I pulled out the food I planned to eat but began to think that it really didn't matter if I ate that or not.  I would blow it sooner or later anyway.  Somehow, I had the idea that I'd had a reckless eating day already, so I might as well just cap the day off with a treat.   I decided to tally what I'd eaten during the day.  It wasn't to see if I could fit in a treat calorie or carbwise.  It was to confirm that it just didn't matter.

Funny thing happened though...I discovered that I had a spot on day with my eating.  I'd had exactly what I needed to have for the 17DD!  I was stunned.  I had built up this whole false reality and was ready to turn that lie in to the truth.  I was shocked, relieved and a little concerned.  Shocked that I'd believed something so completely that was absolutely not true.  Relieved that I wasn't the horrible person I'd decided that I was.  And finally, a little concerned as to the number of times I'd fallen for the lie! 

Of course, I went ahead with the meal I'd planned and was pleased with myself.  Then I got encouraging comments from Sharon and Karen.  These two ladies are a couple of my longest term blog buddies.  I appreciate and respect them very much. This morning, I feel so much better about myself.  That's why I love blogging.

The Dichotomy That Is Me

I don't really know what to make of myself lately.  I am a living, breathing contradiction.  Yesterday I walked 10,448 steps.  That is a personal best for me.  I've had two days over 9000 but until yesterday had not cracked the 10,000 step mark.  Hooray & yahoo!!  Not so fast!!  I got several of those steps eating a girl scout cookie!  What in the world?!?!?  Why would anyone in their right mind eat a cookie while exercising.  I don't know.

This isn't the first time that I've done something good and then something not so good in rapid succession.  In all honesty, I've had a hard time getting on track and staying on track since Valentine's Day.  I really, truly believed that I would successfully pre-start the 17 Day Diet on Monday.  It should not have been hard at all to add in a couple of yogurts each day.  That was really the only major change I was going to make this week.  Next week, I was going to narrow the protein choices and officially start. 

Those two items are the biggest difference in the way I eat now anyway.  It should have been easy.  Instead, I have been all over the map with my eating.  There haven't been those epic mental battles about should I or shouldn't I.  I just do it.  I think what alarms me the most is my attitude about it.  It is just an "Oh well, life happens, move on."  Maybe that is a good attitude, maybe not.  It is foreign to me.

The old me would have towed the line without flaw.  I would be proudly polishing my bright, shiny armor thinking about just how good I am.  How I can do anything I set my mind to and lots of self righteous stuff like that.  And, if I discovered one teeny tiny chink in that armour, I'd be all to pieces.  All I could ever see was that one chink, no matter how small.  I'd do my best to pound it out, or worse, cover it up.

I'm not so much like that any more.  I'm much more forgiving of myself which is a great thing.  But, I don't know where that ends and giving myself carte blanche begins.  Now that armour is so dented that it looks like it has been in a hailstorm.  I'm looking for pretty patterns in the dents rather than trying to pound them out, and I'm certainly not covering them up.

I hope that this is a more 'normal' way of thinking, rather than the all or nothing way I've thought my whole life.  There are good things happening.  I ate A girl scout cookie while walking, not a A SLEEVE of girl scout cookies.  I like myself a little bit better these days, if that makes any sense.  I like not being so uptight.  I like not being so controlled.  I'm hoping that this anything goes type feeling I'm having right now is really just seems that way because it is so different.  I don't know what it feels like to relax a bit without going head first into the deep end the other way.

Tell me...am I right or am I deluding myself?

Another Shopping Experience

I had a gift card that was expiring soon so I decided to go shopping on Saturday and spruce up my wardrobe.  The only thing I needed was a slip, so I had a blank slate as far as what I wanted to explore.  I thought I'd start looking at the size 12 or M, since I really don't know my size, even without considering all the vanity sizing going on these days.  The first thing that caught my eye was a purple and black leopard print blouse.  Alas, it was a size 6.  It would be too small.  But...as I looked at it, I thought that maybe it would fit.  It seemed to be the size of the clothes I'm currently wearing.  I took it to the dressing room and lo & behold, it fit!  I wound up not buying it as it really didn't do much for me on, so I kept looking.

I had a vague notion that I'd like one of those long sweater tops and some leggings.  Now is a good time of year to buy winter clothes since they're usually marked down.  I ventured over to that rack and got even more confused.  I finally selected several options in sizes S, M & L.  They all looked bad!  That is not a style my body is meant to wear, so back to the drawing board...

I'll spare all the boring details about everything I tried on, but at some point I stopped looking at sizes and just tried to decide if it would fit by holding it up.  I was at a major retailer, not a consignment store or thrift store.  It was totally bumfuzzling!

This is what I would up with, how it fit and the size:
*Black dress, with a fitted bodice; it fit a little tight; it was a size 10
*Royal blue dress; it fight tight; it was a size 14
*Black gold scoop necked dress: fit perfectly and looked great; it was a Large
*Funky retro v-neck top; fit perfectly; it was a Medium
*Gold, button up collared blouse; it fit loose, so loose I looked to see if I'd picked up a maternity top!; it was a Small

Yes, I bought clothes size 10, 14, small, medium & large!  What is a girl to do!?!?

Monday Mileage

As of the end of the day yesterday, I have just over 106 miles.  Yeah baby, I broke the 100 mile barrier!  I had another personal best day of 9229 steps, which for me is over 3 miles.

I am proud of myself.  I have set little goals, like 3000 steps before lunch and 6000 before leaving work.  Most of the time I meet those goals, although not all of the time.  Once I get to the point that those little goals are too easy, I'll bump them up.

All of us are keeping each other excited about the challenge.  I've never participated in anything like this before.  I've always kept my diet and fitness goals to myself.  I was too afraid of failure and displaying it to everyone else.  I feel like this is a huge breakthrough with those perfectionistic tendencies I have. 

I set myself out there with a fairly lofty goal.  I'm slowly, slowly working towards it, but I'm not 'on pace' with where I thought I should be.  That's OK.  I understand now, that this is a process.  I'll work up to more and more steps which will add up to more and more miles.  I could walk 1000 miles this year.  It is possible.  It is also possible that I don't.  That is OK too.  The important thing is personal growth.  That is happening.

The 17 Day Diet

I finally got the book from the library on Wednesday, after being on the wait list for what seemed like forever! I started reading it right away and realized that this is just that for which I'd been looking.  I went on amazon and bought the book!  It should be here early next week.  That's OK, I've got plenty of time to keep the library book until my own arrives.

I'm definitely going to do this plan and I believe it is just what I need to get right on down to my goal weight.  The plan appeals to me on several levels:
1.  It is much like what I eat now, with a few minor tweaks, like more food.
2.  It makes sense to me that my body adapts to whatever I'm doing so I need to change periodically
3.  It seems to be a sane and sensible way to eat.

I'm a little sad that some obligations late next week will prohibit me from starting right now.  It seems silly to start when I know that I won't be able to comply for more than one meal at the end of the week.  I'm doing what I'm calling a soft start.  I'm going to start incorporating the probiotics into my diet right now.  That is the biggest change from my current way of eating.  I'm going to allow myself beef & pork for the week too, but only because it is on hand and I need to eat it.

Beginning on next Monday, I'll start day one of the first 17 day cycle. I can get all the way through two cycles and most of the way through the third before my sister's wedding on April 7.

I have a question for those of you experienced with this plan.  Can I really expect to lose 10+ pounds during the first cycle?  I know that a much larger person just starting on a program could, but I've been at this nearly three years now and am very close to my goal.  The last thing I want to do is create an unrealistic expectation and set myself up for failure.  So...talk to me...what is reasonable?

I am excited and ready.  All I have to do now is just do it!

The Waffles

We did indeed have waffles for supper last night.  My considerate husband actually bought gluten free pancake/waffle mix.  He knew that carbs were a limited portion of my diet and thought that would be a better choice.  I don't have celiac disease, so it really didn't matter.  It was, however, extremely thoughtful.  And, I must say, the waffles were delicious!!!

He also bought sausage and bacon.  He knew that protein=good, but was a little concerned about the processed meat.  So he bought both.  Yes, I had both last night, and yes, the scales were up this morning.  It was so worth it.  We had a very pleasant evening.

I must confess at this point that the entire weight gain cannot be blamed on that meal.  I pre-cheated all day!  This is another one of those areas where I thought the battle was done.  I can't remember the last time I pre-cheated.  But yesterday, people kept bringing candy to the office!  That is the downside to working in such a generous office.  I succumbed to the pressure and had several pieces of candy.  It happened.  I'm not happy that it happened, but I'm also not that upset about it.

I think this is one of those strange things that happen from time to time.  I'm going to have to remain diligent about the pre-cheating but I haven't spent much time beating myself up over it.  I feel like I'm on track to get the rest of this weight off.  My sister's wedding is April 7.  That is big motivation for me.  I may not be at goal then, but I'll be much closer than I am now.  That's for sure.

I also picked up the 17 day diet book at the library today.  So many of my blog friends have recommended it, and I've been on the wait list forever.  I'm expecting great things.  I can't wait to dig in to it.  65MD has even said he might join  me.

Happy Valentine's Day!

65MD asked me on Sunday if I wanted to go out to eat tonight.  I said that I didn't.  I didn't want to be out in the crowds.  Instead, I said I would much rather us have a nice evening at home. In fact, I thought it would be a good idea for him to prepare our evening meal.  I even said that I would suspend any eating rules I had for the meal.  He could make whatever he wanted and I would eat it.  Then I had second thoughts!!! 

Sometimes his menu selections are, let's just say, odd.   I decided to channel his thoughts a bit and suggested that he make something special from our history.  I reminded him of the time when we were newly dating and he made waffles.  I meant that as a suggestion to get his mind moving in that direction.  I was hoping that he'd think of something else we'd eaten together on a special occasion, or had a special meaning for just the two of us.  Apparently, he heard "Please make waffles for me on Valentine's Day."  Last night he mentioned something about having waffles for supper tonight.

So, I will happily eat waffles tonight and enjoy the company of the man I love, knowing that he only wants to give me what I want.  It makes me smile even thinking about it as I type.  I'm one lucky girl.  I won't let a few extra carbs ruin my happiness.

I hope all of my readers are equally blessed.  Have a happy day.

Monday Mileage

I have logged 90 miles as of yesterday.  Four days last week, I registered a personal best for steps.

I had an all day retreat on Saturday for strategic planning at work.  It really blew my record.  I knew going in that I would be largely sedentary for most of the day.  I told myself that if I got 3000 steps in that I'd be glad.  I got almost 4000.  I was pleased with myself and how I'd set a goal for myself and tried to keep myself challenged in less than ideal circumstances.  I guess I got a little too pleased with myself because I barely cracked 2500 steps yesterday.

I did the same thing with eating over the weekend.  Breakfast & lunch were provided on Saturday.  I had my own breakfast and skipped the carb-fest of muffins & bagels some people think of as a meal.  For lunch, there were two salad options.  I had some of both.  I really did not care for the sandwich & chips, although they looked fine.  I really, truly wanted the salad.  I wanted the crispy, crunch of the greens over the chips.  There was no internal mental battle at all.  Go me!!

Not so fast...the next thing I realized there were empty candy wrappers in front of me.  During the afternoon, bowls of mini chocolate candy bars were on our table.  I ate at least 4 before coming to, and realizing what I was doing.   I did struggle not to eat more as the afternoon progressed. 

I don't know what is going on with me.  I recognize growth on the one hand with setting reasonable expectations of myself and truly preferring a healthy option.  BUT, on the other hand, I ate candy with no real conscious consideration.  When I did consider it; I wanted it!  I wanted the candy as much or more than I wanted the salad.  It is such a contradiction.  I'm not sure how to deal with this, since I've always been all or nothing, on or off, etc.  Is this a good thing?  Is this moderation?  I don't know! 

My Slip Fell Off

I'm one of those women that still wears a slip and hosiery particularly when I want a more polished look.  Sometimes, like today, I'm glad for an extra layer as well.

This morning on my way in to the building from the car, I encountered a co-worker and we walked in together.  I felt something brushing my lower leg but thought it was my heavy coat.  I don't wear it very often and thought that the coat came down longer than I remembered.  We chatted about her daughter's drama with clothes this morning as we made our way into the building.

We continued to chat as we hung our coats up and were joined by another co-worker.  Just as I realized that it couldn't be my coat brushing my legs the second co-worker commented on how nice I looked.  I thanked her as I looked down to see what might be brushing my leg and saw my slip!  It was almost at my ankles by then.  I'm not sure what was keeping it from falling all the way to the floor.  We all had a good laugh to start the day.

Monday Mileage

I have just over 75 miles logged so far this year.  I had a personal best on Friday with nearly 3 miles!  Although the scales have stalled a bit, I'm feeling thinner.  I'm also thinking that I look thinner.  I do NOT think I am building muscle because I'm not really doing anything to make that happen.  Wii fit boxing will get my heart rate up if I push myself, as does the hula hoop and some of the other 'games' but I'm not doing anything weight bearing.  I think my body is just going through one of those weird anomalies.  I've got my plan and I'm working it.  The scales will catch up.

I think I'm going to encounter more and more of these anomalies as I approach my goal.  That's one reason I decided to let the weekly weight report go.  Being healthy is what is most important, although looking nice is a pleasant side effect.

cheatsad

I read a lot of blogs.  More than I want to confess at this time.  I try to be encouraging and comment along the way.  I know that makes me feel good, and I hope it makes others feel good too.  So, I was leaving a comment earlier on a blog with word verification and this came up for me to enter '"cheatsad"!  I had to chuckle to myself and I had to share it. 

Monthly Weigh In

I just about forgot my new plan to post my weight the first of each month.

Today the scales said 173.4.  I really would have like to been below 170, since I can't seem to get out and stay out of the 170's.  Even though I say I'd like to see a lower number.  I'm not all wound up in it.  I'll get there.