Total Weight Loss

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Big Trouble

I've stopped yo-yoing! That is not good news. To me, yo-yoing means that the scales go up and down. This week they've done nothing but go up! I'm getting discouraged, 65MD left this morning, and the voices in my head are making friends. A storm is brewing because the discouragement is making me want to eat, no one is there to help, not even The Voice of Truth. The thoughts in my head go something like this:

The Little Voice (TLV): "Let's eat one of those Girl Scout Cookies every day until they're gone."
The Voice of Truth (TVoT): "That isn't a very good idea."
TLV: "Yes, that will take too long to eat them. Let's eat three per day until they're gone."
TVoT: "Ummm...I don't think that's right."

A little later:
TLV: "An Icee sure would taste good."
TVoT: "Yes, those are good, but they're better on a hot summer day, when they are icy cold."
TLV: "OK, we can save that for a summer treat. How about a cherry limeade?"
TVoT: "There aren't really any Sonics on the way home."

And then:
TLV: "Stop and get one of those old fashioned cake donuts on the way home."
TVoT: "We can't stop on the way home. We have to go straight home to let the dog out."
TLV: "A chocolate old fashioned cake donut would really be good."
TVoT: Beginning to crack  "Chocolate frosting, or chocolate cake?"
TLV: "How about one of each? Plus they have Icees there!"
TVoT: Finally regaining a little control "No! You have got to stop this, or I'm going to have to blog about it."
TLV: "Please don't! They'll hold you accountable and make me stop."
TVoT: "That's the whole point."

And around and around my head spins. I did get myself a big fat steak to eat for supper tonight. I'm hoping the indulgent feeling of eating it will help ease the desire to run off the rails completely. I'm also hoping that if it isn't, I'll at least be full enough to ward off the munchie monster!

It is obvious to me now, that the whole grain carb way of eating is absolutely not going to work for me. I've gained 8.4 pounds since my lowest weight before I got sick in February (about a month ago). Those are out of my diet as of right now. I have three weeks before I go to Destin for a week. I could squeeze in a quick round of hcg. It is a little close between rounds, but I'm getting desperate. I am not, no way, no how going to let this small set back put me in to a tailspin. I've worked too hard and too long to let the weight creep back up. I've just got to come up with a plan that works. And FAST!

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry you are feeling discouraged. I can so identify with your voices.