Mind Games

I've said more than once and read more than once that so much of the weight loss battle is in the mind.  Mine has been in such turmoil lately, that I haven't done much any battling on the weight loss front.  I feel fat and gross.  I needed to feel better.  Reality doesn't factor in to the equation as much as feelings.

So, this morning as I was selecting what to wear to church, I opted for the largest dress I own, I think.  It is a simple sheath dress that my mother made for me probably 15 years ago.  She made me & my sisters matching Easter dresses that year just like she had when we were little girls.  It had gotten too small over the years, but I didn't part with it for sentimental reasons.  I wore it again proudly, on the way back down this time.  Once again, I held on to it, and probably always will because my mother made it and my sisters have (had?) one like it.  It hung on me.  It was just the feeling I needed.

I realized that I like the feeling of shrinking.  I've managed to keep a very nice wardrobe on the way down through consignment and gifts, so I haven't had that clothes handing off of me feeling in a long while.  It definitely gave me a boost.  I've got a ways to go to get back to the emotional place where I usually operate, but maybe this is enough to fake it until I make it.

If not, I'll check in with my doctor.  I have an appointment at the end of April to check on my weight anyway.  It is a new week and a new season of the year, maybe even a new page in my journey down the scales.